No. 60 All Politicians are Scum!

You didn’t really need me to tell you that…

According to the Prime Minister and saviour of the world, Gordon Brown, the present economic crisis is no more than “the birth-pangs of a new global order.” Apparently the solution is not to “muddle through it as pessimists but make the necessary adjustment to a better future…”

It would seem this ‘necessary adjustment’ is for the likes of you and I to make. By losing our jobs, our livelihoods and our homes. Repossessions are on the rise and although we’re not even a month into 2009, the likes of Zavvi, Adams, Barratts, Barclays and Corus have announced closures, receivership and mass redundancies. Of course, those five are just the tip of the iceberg with other high-street chains shutting up shop and the lifespan of the likes of Jaguar looking very grim indeed.

But so long as the boys in Westminster are all right, that’s all that matters.

Words cannot begin to describe the anger and absolute revulsion Jeffman feels towards these scabrous, reptilian politicians who once elected to power see fit to abuse it. That goes for all denominations. A septic brew of arrogance, lies, perceived self-importance, greed and veritable fuckwittery has put us in the foul position we now find ourselves in, all courtesy of the esteemed members of Parliament.

It’s safe to say that the vile legacy of the 1980s – where what we already owned was unexpectedly sold back to us and our industries were flogged off to the highest bidder, whilst cheap imports replaced sustainable, home-grown products – is still bearing its sour fruits. It was then that the money men were handed the keys to the castle and allowed free reign and it’s this gesture, plus either the unwillingness or inability of a subsequent government supposedly on the side of the common man to reverse these acts of piracy, that see’s the scrapheap of human life pile ever higher.

The warning signs that we would be dragged into the whirlpool of a global recession have long been there but the initial reaction from our elected representatives was to refute this claim and say that we were in good shape to steer ourselves clear.

Lies or ineptitude? Either would see the greater part of the population fired or at best facing disciplinary procedures. As it’s the public purse that pays their wages, bare-faced lying is surely a criminal offence!

Of course it isn’t. Not where a politician is concerned. A prerequisite of becoming a successful MP is the ability to lie through your teeth, preferably on both sides of your face. This is done in the safe knowledge that if it were to ever come on top the buck could easily be passed to one of the sub-species, fawning lackeys they employ to mop up the trails of slime left in their wake.

So now they’ve finally announced that we’re officially in recession, why should any sane thinking man or woman believe the previous claims that we’re both well positioned to ride out the storm and that they’re the ones to sail us through?

All politicians are scum! Anybody labouring under the misguided assumption that they have a divine right to speak for somebody else should be thrown out of any political race by default. Anybody whose ego is so horrendously distended that they believe people would want to vote for them (policies have become mix-and-match across the board and therefore meaningless) should be hounded from the comfort of  their middle-class suburb, dragged down to the nearest river and immediately drowned. As Groucho Marx famously said “I don’t care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.“ The same can be said for the freeloading scum presently lording it over us.

100 years ago there were two main political parties in this country with no distinguishing differences between them. Conservative and Liberal. Both with the interests of the rich at heart. Now there are three main parties with no distinguishing differences between them – and still with the sole interests of the rich at heart. How far we’ve come!

There was a popular slogan scrawled on the walls of Great Britain during the Thatcher regime of the 1980s. One that got Charlie Brooker into a certain amount of trouble with some crazed Americans when he used it in an article regarding the Bush administration a few years back.  I shall leave you on its rather pertinent sentiment:

“Guy Fawkes, Where are you now that we Need You?”

Make of that what you will.

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